Why It's Time to Rewrite the Rules

A message for ambitious and driven women, ready for a change

5 years ago, we started our partnership by launching Cabot & Main. And to be honest, the start of it all was a little more rocky than we expected. And not for reasons you would expect.

While I had left my corporate job and started my first business a few years prior, Ashley was still in Corporate trying to manage both her corporate job and our new business.

And while we were so excited to dive into our new business, the burn out of trying to do it all, and do it all well hit us both. Fast.

Ambition is something that has been forever ingrained into both of us. We want to achieve, we want to do well, we want to have success, we want to be…in word, perfect. And that in itself is clearly a trap.

By trying to be perfect on our first go around in business, by trying to literally do all the things while still holding on to the same rules we had always lived by, we were heading down a path that wasn’t sustainable.

It’s really hard when you’re used to living in the corporate world of hustle, long hours, strict rules, etc. to break out of that. But that’s exactly what we realized we had to do. We were living by the rules of corporate, but also by the rules that we had always lived by (i.e. you have to do it all, say yes to everything, don’t rock the boat, be perfect, etc.)

Photo by WENHUI LIN on Unsplash

Looking back, I feel incredibly fortunate that we had each other to turn to when things got really hard. That cage we built for ourselves when we started our business together felt heavy and when the burden got too big, we sat down to have an honest conversation about what we were doing, and whether it was even worth it anymore.

And rather than throw in the towel on our new business, we decided to do something about it. So we started by getting real honest about what we wanted, what we needed, and what wasn’t working. Those conversations were difficult and vulnerable, but they caused an almost immediate shift in the way we were going about things.

Through those difficult conversations, we were able to realize some truths about ourselves and our business, and those truths lead to decisions, which lead to action.

If it wasn’t for those conversations, we may have been stuck living by the same rules that caused us to burn out multiple times. But it wasn’t just about having a conversation, it was the content of what we talked about, the vulnerability we were willing to practice, and the mindset that changed everything.

And the mindset was this:

Just because it’s always been a certain way, doesn’t mean it has to continue to be.

And when you start to think about the rules you’ve been living by, and the self limiting mindset you may have, only then can you start to make change. But it truly does start with awareness.

Awareness → conversations → decisions → action → change

Our goal with The Rewrite Project, and the Letters you’ll find here, is to help bring awareness to those rules and those limiting beliefs so that we can start to have conversations about difficult, life impacting things in order to bring about change.

We were so lucky to have each other, but not everyone has someone who gets it.

Someone who gets what it feels like to be ambitious but to hate the box they’re in.

Someone who has dealt with perfectionism and feels complete exhaustion by it.

Someone who has put so much pressure on themselves to achieve, only to now realize that what they want has changed.

Someone who keeps burning out because things aren’t changing.

As high achieving, ambitious women who live by a certain set of rules, life can be exhausting because what we’re doing never feels like enough.

But it is enough. You are enough. And it’s ok to want to change things.

If we can make meaningful changes to our mindset, set of rules, and the way we live our lives then trust me, you can too.

We invite you to join us inside this space where we’re going to be addressing some of the rules we’ve lived by, those self limiting beliefs, and the expectations we have for ourselves.

It’s going to start with awareness, and we invite you to be part of the conversation with us as well.

So if you are ambitious and driven but are exhausted and ready for meaningful change, then this is where you start. We aren’t giving you a formulaic plan, or heavy work to do - we’re giving you the time and space to learn,to question the rules you’ve been living by, and to begin to believe that change is possible.

If you’re ready to make some meaningful changes, we’ll be here to help cheer you on. You deserve to have a full-life where you get to create your own story, break the rules, and live life on your own terms - whatever that looks like for you.

So join us here, subscribe and let’s continue this journey together.

We’re so happy you are here! Make sure you stay tuned as our first monthly “rewrite” is all about breaking the rules.

XOXO,

Katie & Ashley